Jokes of the day

Posted: September 18, 2012 in coco jokes, jimmy fallon

According to a new research, heavier men last longer in bed. But that includes the time they spend looking for their penis.

MacDonalds announced they are gonna start posting for the first time ever their calorie count of their menu items. Not to be outdone, Cinnabon announced they would start posting their death toll.

The Dalai Lama said it’s time for humanity to abandon religion. Man sounds like someone just got dumped.

The oldest person on facebook is a 101-year-old woman. She said: I wanna waste what little time I have left.

During the republican convention, a group of conservative gays threw a party called homocon. People said it’s just like comiccon but less gay.

Cinnabon has been working to develop the Cinnabon pizza. We are also developing the new type 3 diabetes.

Scientists have discovered that there is such a thing as breast orgasm. So sorry ladies that’s one more orgasm you are gonna have to fake.

During last night’s debate, Mitt Romney said he loves big bird. Which is even more awkward since the question was: can you explain your tax plan.

The highly anticipated video game NBA2K13 hits stores this week. It is very realistic. In fact as soon as you win, a kardashian shows up and marries you.

While campaigning in Colorado, Mitt Romney made a stop at the fast food restaurant Chipotle. The guy behind the counter was like: burrito? And Romney was like: hey there Burrito, my name is Mitt Romney.

President Obama called Mitt Romney a pioneer of outsourcing jobs. And then Romney said: I dare him to come to India and say that to my face.

According a report that just came out, the average Canadian is now richer than the average American. Yeah this is bad news for Americans and worse news for those Mexicans who have to tunnel all the way to Canada.

A website has posted photos of retired playboy bunnies who are now in their sixties. Yeah to see their entire breasts, you just need to keep scrolling down.

The developer who was responsible for Apple Map fail was fired. Before he left the company he asked for the letter of recommendation and directions home.

A new study shows that over 70% of married women prefer sleeping to having sex. When asked, my wife said: what’s the distinction?

Apple has sold over 2 million iPhone5s in China, so even in China the best gifts are the ones your kids make.

Over the weekend a man was arrested trying to break into Taylor Swift’s house, it’s a good thing Police arrived cos we know one thing Taylor’s not good at is holding onto a man.

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